I'm not going to lie...

To be honest, I don't know much/enough about suicide... I am glad about this, because I guess if I did know a lot about it, then that would mean I knew somebody who had killed themselves... I know quite a lot if people who self harm, most who are close friends, I support them theough that, but to be totally honest, I have no idea whatsoever what they are feeling. I thought I did, I thought I could sympathise with them and help them through it, but I just don't understand. I want to, and I feel sorry for them all! But I am not going to pretend I know how to support them when I don't. The reason I am saying this, is because I was originally going to put my email on the previous post so people could ask for support, but I rescently searched #suicide into Instagram and it hit me. I was utterly disturbed to what I saw, people casually uploading their cut-covered arms, with an annotation of 'I got bored' I just don't understand it... It makes me really upset to think that people would do this to them self. So I realised that I don't actually know what they go through and I should therefore not advertise myself as 'someone to talk to'. 

I thought seeing these pictures would make me happier with my life, and feel relieved to not have to go through that, but it just burnt a hole inside me. 

This is one if the quotes that really touched me... Since I am 14 too :(

I hope this does not come across like me showing off saying I am 'one if the lucky ones' and I am not in anyway saying I am discusted by it... But it is very hard for some people to understand what others go through. 

X

Suicide/Self harm

Just to say, before anyone gets worried that this is some kind of goodbye post. It is not. Don't worry :').

Right, so I don't think I have ever had suicidal thoughts, and I am not trying to advertise that I am 'perfect' or 'happy'. But what I do know is that there is a recipe to happiness... This is different for everyone, so I can't really tell you what to do, but happiness is basically one of the most important things in life. When people say 'would you rather be rich and sad, or poor and happy' you must be quite silly to say the former.
People often associate money with happiness because money can buy the essentials, but this is not the case. I have gotten quite off subject now, but what I was trying to say is, if life is not what you want it to be, life can change. Infact it will change, and if you are getting bullied, or getting hate messages, the. Just be the better person, turn off your phone, and try hard in school, because although at the time, it may seem hard to not follow the crowd, there is no 'crowd' after school. This is why the 'nerds' always win. This isn't just to do with suicide, but depression too. Just do what you want in life! There's no point copying everyone else... 

Shopping list...

Ohh dear I'm about a year late on most of these products, but I am going into town next week, and there are a few beauty/fashion items that I am going to get.

First off is maybelline baby lips, so a lot if the you-tubers that I watch rave about this! And I am craving it! 

Next I am looking for a new concealer... Not sure which one I will get but I want one with a lot of coverage, anyway I suppose it will be a lucky dip when I get there (if anybody has any recommendations, comment down below and I would really appreciate it)

I also need to get some more batiste dry shampoo since that is a must have, as well as some new shampoo/conditioner and heat protectant spray...

Hopefully I will see some nice BarryM nail polishes and If they have any new colours, I might invest.

All of those products will be from boots hopefully...

Next up is a jewelry/fashion purchase, a gold ring. I have been looking for one for quite I while and I think I will find one in topshop... (It is not going to be real gold before you ask). 

I think that's all to be honest! Most of them are really small purchases but I think they will add up to quite a lot unfortunately! Anyway, please please please comment down below if you have 'discovered' any good products rescently since I never really get to speak to my readers x

That Autumnal feeling...

Aggh! Autumn is soon approaching! I guess this is a good thing since autumn is the end of one year, and the run up to CHRISTMAS, but it is also one if the worst seasons for weather! We can see a lot of rain and cold mornings approaching here in the UK, which I am not looking forward to... Apart from this, I love autumn! I'm not really sure why? But the autumnal colours are lovely, the reds and oranges etc. In autumn, I also do most of my Christmas shopping (what a surprise that I included Christmas) ;)  but this is mostly stuff for myself, and I enjoy a lot of days out with my mum :). Another highlight of the autumn is the fashions! I must admit that I feel a lot more comfortable in a fur lined coat, wooly scarf and Ugg boots than anything else... Aswell as these autumnal 'staples', tartan is going to be a big hit this year too! So I will look forward to seeing all of the seasonal patterns around too... I suppose this has turned into a seasonal must haves! But a song I am looking forward to listening to in the autum is 'bonfire heart' by James Blunt... It is a really seasonal song, which I would love to listen to in the chilly autumn evenings... 

Please enjoy this quote that I made! :')

New pages?

So I was trying to open up some different pages to my blog, but it didn't seem to work :')... I did open up a page with monthly must haves, but I don't know how to put on more posts... Which just shows what a professional blogger I am ;)

But seriously, I will try to sort that out, and start new things on here! So if you have any good ideas, then feel free to comment :)

Being apart from paradise

So last summer, only a matter if weeks ago, I was in Barbados, from the picture below you can see that it was quite easy on the eye! I just miss it so much and it's going to be at least a year until I go to somewhere with that beauty again... Christmas is in its way (Y) and I am pretty excited! I love all of the festive stuff! (As I said in a previous post) but if you look out of your window each day and see a view similar to the picture below, I can honestly say that you are living a happy life... 

Bright lights, city life...

For some reason lately, I have had a craving for the city life. So I do actually live in a city but skanky Wolverhampton does not have much appeal (sorry)... I often go to Birmingham for shopping etc. and I get a small glimpse of the hub bub, but it's just not the same. I haven't visited New York since 2010! That was my first visit and currently my last... I just want to be able to discover the bright lights again and live that dream, I would love to work there some day... I'm not sure what excites me so much about the city... But I do get a burst of happiness when I think about it... I just hope that my dream will soon come true. 

And there is a very quality bad picture I took last time I was in NYC :)